Darwin in Hungary

It's a good indication of how this year has gone, that I've not posted here in almost a year. The combination of teaching and writing my Master's paper (in addition to my two other part-time jobs) has been completely overwhelming. Much as I did when I was working with congregations, I have to remind myself that the goal is not to do the best I possibly can, but to do the best I can under the circumstances. This year, there have been circumstances in full supply.

Near the end of the second year of our program, we are expected to produce a research paper of about 40 pages, something that acknowledges the work that has already been done in our area and contributes significantly to that body of literature. Because I have continued to hold out hope that I could contribute something of value to research involving Eastern Europe, my adviser and I settled on something related to the reception of Darwin's work in Hungary. Although my Hungarian language skills have been better, I figured that this would be a good opportunity to put them to use, and perhaps sharpen them a bit for my dissertation. The reality has been that having to read everything in an especially difficult foreign language slowed my progress enormously, a fact that was not surprising to anyone but me.

As challenging intellectually as the research was, I was also surprised to find that the hardest part was actually the emotional challenge of it. After years of feeling very competent as a writer and preacher in my ministries, I have had to face the insecurity of being a beginner once again. My approach to research was unfocused. My note-taking was disorganized. My writing was completely different from what was expected of me by other historians. One classmate reassured me that the process was going to push every one of my insecurity buttons, and she was right. It turns out that I have more buttons than an airplane cockpit.

The good news (and one of the lessons we're supposed learn, I suppose) is that we don't really go through the process alone, although it's easy to feel that way. The faculty and my classmates have been very helpful and supportive and, although there's so much that I wish were better about the paper itself, it has been an intense and amazing educational experience. If I were to start researching that same paper today, my approach would be quite different, based on all that I've learned about the conventions of historical writing.

Since other duties are calling, I'll just post a link to the paper itself, in case anyone else is interested in seeing what the work of a new historian looks like. It's not pretty, but hey -- doesn't everything start out a little rough around the edges?

The Reception of Darwin’s Work in Hungary’s Nineteenth-Century Popular Press